What does it mean to receive and accept an engagement ring? Does acceptance of the ring mean it is a gift from the guy to the girl? Or is acceptance of the ring conditional on the requirement that you consent to the marriage? I recently read that a man is suing his ex-fiancee to get his $64k ring back after she broke off the engagement.
In my mind, the word “engagement” is synomous with the word “commitment.” A ring, in my mind, is a symbol of the commitment between the couple. In non-western cultures, other symbols or approaches are used to get engaged (i.e., this could include the guy’s family giving gifts to the bride-to-be’s family and asking for their acceptance). So, when a guy decides to be commited to a girl and gives her a ring, this should simply mean he has given her a “gift” of his commitment. And, when a girl decides to accept his gift and reciprocates her commitment, that constitutes the engagement phase. There is no requirement that a ring be given in order for an engagement to exist. Therefore, when a guy gives a girl a ring, that ring is simply a gift, no more no less.
So, to me, a gift is a gift. In legal terms, a gift should have no conditions attached to it; if it does, it would not be a gift. So, once a donor gifts the gift, he no longer has ownership over it. In summary, I think that it’s crazy to pursue legal actions to get a gift back once you’ve already gifted it to someone (even though it may be an expensive gift… such as a $64k ring… albeit this sounds to me like the gift was used to buy love instead of showing love). Notwithstanding the above, as a kind gesture, if you’ve changed your mind about a guy and the gift is that expensive, you should give back the ring out of courtesy.